Halloween Horror or Hilarity?

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Halloween Horror or Hilarity?

 
A history of magic, a history of Halloween costumes, both good and scary. Here is a narrative about my costumes thru the ages, for good fun, or maybe a fright. You decide!
 
 
Age 2: Hot Mess Toddler
 
 
So I found this pic the other day, and went up to my mom "mom, what's with the half-ass costume? just because I'm little, you didn't know what to do with me?" mom-"you said you wanted to be a fashion model" touché. Mademoiselle t-shirt that was probably free from a magazine subscription was a nice touch.
 
 
Age 3: Full costume, now my brother get's half-ass'ed.

 
I clearly do not remember this, because I most definitely wouldn't have picked red. But I was still adorbs.

 
Age 5: The tutu that saw a million wears

 
I was clearly feeling this one! So much so, I wore it again two years later....
 
 
Age 6: A clown

 
There's a reason this picture of me is missing. But this was the first and only time in history my parents dressed up! My mom would use that horn to humiliate me at peoples doorstops when I was taking too long to grab candy. Next!
 
 
Age 7: The forever princess

 
I told my mom some embellishments were needed to reflect my royal-ness. Obviously, I couldn't get enough.
 
 
Age 10: The dark age begins

 
Who's idea was this?!
 
 
Age 11: Nice witch? I fooled you

 
As if my eyebrows weren't scary enough as it is, lets go ahead and draw in moles.
 
 


Age 12: Identity Crisis

 
I remember this was a last minute purchase for a middle school party, and I hated it. Bring me back to the dark.
 
 
Age 14: Self Portrait

 
I was feeling it that night, for real (and my horns lit up)
 
Lets take a break. After this devils costume, I had one more bout with an embarrassing look I thought was sweet, and that was a deranged fairy. Fast forward to my senior year and I was a sexy black cat (duh) and a drugged out Hannah Montana (its apparent that I have a gift for telling the future). It was awesome, I got Hannah' blonde wig, a cutesy little outfit, a microphone, some smeared make-up and no filter on my mouth! Unfortunately, pictures from those days are floating around on Myspace somewhere where I obviously haven't remembered my password since 2006.
 
College: Gold Digger
 
 
I wore this damn costume every year until 2010. NO JOKE. Good thing is, it was always a hit, and kind of ironic for me. I paid $64 for this my freshman year of college, which back then was like $300 to me now. Damn right I'm wearing the hell out of that! It kind of became my calling card. Here is me and my roommate/best friend hitting up the campus parties. Best part was the next morning (at like noon, ok?) we headed to the college student union for breakfast and were totally wrecked from the night before. Walking into the cafeteria of hundreds of kids in normal clothes in this ensemble, like a boss! Thing was, I was too exhausted to notice. It wasn't until someone made a comment to me that evening that I finally changed. Good times : )
 
 
Age 20: Lady Gaga
 
 
Wore this to a concert first, then resurrected it for a party that year.
 
 
Age 21: My Twilight Obsession

 
Born for that role, right?

 
I mean...I was obsessed. Pretty clever huh? And yes I really was that pale.
 
 
Age 23: The Cowardly Lion. I mean a fox. What?

 
When I was on the management team at Old Navy, they wanted to do a Wizard of Oz theme day at work, so naturally I wanted to be the feline in the bunch. This was completely homemade, if you couldn't tell. Don't worry, nobody else could either.

 
 
Age 23: Gold Digger strikes again!


See? cliché I know. If I had to do it over again that night now? Id totally go as a vintage wrestler along with the group of guys.
 
 
Dapper Dolce!

 
My cat went as a Chippendale last year. He is pimp.
 
 
2014: In my rightful place. The dark side.




This is my costume. I'm  homicidal maniac, they look just like everybody else.
 
What shall I be this year? It's a secret. BUT! Somebody please, please, please have a full-costumed masquerade ball and invite me, because if you know my obsession with The Tudors, then you will see me show up as this:
 
 


SLAYYY Anne Boleyn slay.
 
Trick or treat!
 
xo









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